By: Youheng Zhong
“This vessel is great, Jack! It’s got everything. Like they literally put a full-sized refrigerator on here! And The Dolphin is stylish too! Just look at that fresh coat of paint!” said Luke, one of Jack’s closest friends.
“Yeah, Jack, thanks for the free vacation. I’ve been dying to go to Miami.”
“No problem people, you guys are the reason I’m here today. Now have some champagne, will you?” Jack replied.
“Cheers!”
Unfortunately, they forgot to include one of their friends, who happened to be the captain. He used to be part of this tight-knit group, but was left out partway through their journey when he became friends with the millionaires. He had done most of the hard work when he was still a part of the group of friends and was steaming with anger that he got left out of what he worked hard to be a part of.
Luckily, as captain, he had quite a bit of control over the ship.
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“The ship is sinking! Everyone get on the lifeboat!” yelled the captain over the private yacht.
There was a hurried rush to the lifeboats. Jack was tried to move toward the small boats, but he had minor problems getting there. First, when the captain yelled the orders, Jack was taking a nap alone in his bed naked, so he had to put on his clothes, none of which included casual clothing that he could chuck on in two seconds. As a result, he spent a good two minutes finding suitable clothing, putting it on, and then attempting to exit.
The door jammed.
“Damn you, stupid door!” Jack yelled. He remembered the karate classes he took when he was younger and promptly kicked down the door, running for his life through ankle-deep water to the deck.
Meanwhile, Robert, Jack’s brother, was also stuck. When the captain shouted at everyone over the speakers, Robert was doing his business in the bathroom. Panicking, Robert forgot to pull up his pants and ran out the door. But when he was halfway down the hall, his pants fell. Normally, this won’t be much of a slow down, but the hallway where Robert stood was filled knee-deep with water. As Robert stopped to pull his trousers up, he brought with him a lot of seawater that weighed him down, delaying his arrival as he, too, ran to the deck.
Both men arrived on deck simultaneously, ready to flee the sinking ship. However, they found that only one spot remained.
They looked at each other and had the same thought: “Screw it! We both can fit in the lifeboat!” preparing to jump on the raft.
The captain saw what was happening and quickly intervened. “No, no, no you two, as much as I wish to have you both on board, only ONE of you are getting on, as I have no wish to sink to the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean and rot because some idiot decided that he can fit on a nine-person-raft when there are already nine people on it!”
“Okay, then why do we only have a nine-person raft when there’s 10 of us Captain?” demanded Jack.
“Because, because there are nine of you guys!”
“So, there isn’t a spot reserved for you?”
“But if you don’t have me on your raft, then you’ll all die anyways!” the Captain cried.
“I know how to drive a boat,” Robert intervened. “I know how to do the radio and techy stuff, too. My grandpa took me fishing on Gleaming Tributaries and taught me how to steer the boat, so I could fish by myself. Also, Captain, you did this on purpose, didn’t you? We wanted to go off the coast of Miami. Right now, we’re in the middle of the Bermuda Triangle!”
“How did you know that?” sputtered the Captain.
“I know how to drive a boat! That includes navigation, you idiot! We’ve been veering off course since noon!”
Jack was stunned. “You knew that?”
Robert nodded.
“Okay, then by democracy, we’re booting the captain, and our new captain is my brother, Robert. Do we all agree?”
There was a bobbing of heads.
And with a kick from Jack, the Captain went overboard. It was a shame that he didn’t know how to swim.
Jack and Robert boarded the raft as the last of their brand new private yacht, the results of their hardwork, disappear under the black waters. And this time, the friends made it to their destination, off the coast of Miami, far away from the Bermuda Triangle.